So I'm kind of tripping out. This is my second, first post. It's the second time I've written a "Are you there, Blogosphere? It's me, Elle" post. And it's sooo weird.
You see, I'm a born-again blogger. I ran a blog for 2 years and, I don't know how to say this, but I was kind of a big deal. I might as well have been Dooce's prodigy; strike that - she gets enough play and I'd rather be Jenny's prodigy. (Jenny is Ah! Maze! ing!) Okay, so I wasn't really worthy of either's company, but my blog was relatively successful. People loved me. Men through their cyber underwear at me (it was weird). And then I ended it. Like a bad relationship that had gone on too long and ends up a Lifetime feature movie, I finally walked out.
And now you're wondering why, right? (I know, I'm totally like Miss Cleo and shit.) I ended my previous blogship because (like many relationships) I was losing myself. If I'm totally honest, I didn't lose myself as much as I compromised myself. I knew how many people read the blog, how many of those people I actually knew in real life, and it all became about pleasing them rather than getting getting my "art" out. Really, the whole situation was a pressure cooker for all my co-dependent issues.
So I quit. In an effort to redefine (find?) my voice, I walked away. Maybe someday I'll let my former fans know about this new blog, but for now this is for me. If you feel so inclined to join me, sweet. If not, go fuck yourself. Just kidding. I mean, unless you want to.. then that's cool, whatever.
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I've thought about doing that before. It's the right thing to do when you can't write how/about what you want.
ReplyDeleteI had a similar expirence. I wrote a decent blog with decent traffic for a few years. Paid for a pretty site and domain name, etc. But I was always censored myself, knowing that my real life was reading every word. Then, the whole thing went to hell as a secret was exposed.
ReplyDeleteI took a few years off and started again, without letting anyone in my real life know. So far, it's been much more enjoyable this time around.
Which is a very long winded way of saying welcome back, glad to have found you and looking forward to your second life.